In the noose this morning

17 November 2009 § Leave a comment

Good morning form the greatest lump of earth this side of 495. The world powers have not fallen to their knees quite yet, but they might be on their way. Too many guns and prostitution and candy bars flooding our market. The recession is in full swing, and the stress has more people investing in drugs to calm them down, keeping tax dollars from being shoved into the pockets of town councils and executives everywhere. Sarah Palin is now an author, and if everything continues the way it is, with the people of the world bending over to take it any way the can be paid to, she’ll be the next author-president, and we’ll really have to watch out – especially the writers – now she’s a part of us. Assimilation!

I found an envelope postmarked new years nineteen forty five. I wasn’t alive then, but it’s good to know the postmen were doing their jobs on such a holiday, with the war going on and all. I’m not sure if electrical tape had been invented yet, but I’m not sure it would have done them much good if they got into a jam. Were they all walking still, or did they have their jeeps yet? No, they’re all in Moab in the spring, narrowly escaping hoards of Boy Scouts looking to explore the Green River, find some hundred year old hieroglyphs left by this explorer. Those were the days. No one really bothered you then, even if the bears and dynamite were in cahoots. Perhaps it was delivered with the same daring as the pony express. Maybe the postmen should be driving those new Mustangs.

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