Emergency: Trials!

19 November 2009 § Leave a comment

After eight years of poor decisions, two wars, many wrongful imprisonments of Muslims the world over, millions of injections of new and bold prejudices of which this culture can’t seem to get enough, and a whole new era of the American Way redefined (including but not limited to the inability to carry a bottle of drinking water with you on an airplane), we have come down to the trials of the September Eleventh suspects, which at this point are going to be held in a civilian court in lower Manhattan, just a few blocks from their comrades’ last cordial visit to New York City.

For someone whose knowledge of the law is pretty much limited to juvenile court and Hollywood’s Grisham films, I think a few mistakes are being made here: first, that a jury is supposed to be of the unbiased sort – but let’s get back to that in a moment. Trials are supposed to be held in the district of the crime, right? According to Doc Hollywood and My Cousin Vinny, we have an affirmative. So in this case, our endearing president has got us on the right track – just so we know where we are. Now, back to the unbiased jury part (let’s call on Runaway Jury for that scoop – “This is the blood of innocent children gunned down by greedy corporations!” – drag him out of here.) That’s lunch!

Sincerely; how might they find an objective jury in Manhattan, of all places, to fairly try these scoundrels? As well, since confessions have been made, which is a good thing on them, for a severe lack of physical evidence looms over everyone going to be present, we’re all expecting this to be a circus in which these gentlemen have the same rights as the burglar subjected to having to eat dog food because he was locked in the garage of the burglaree’s home, but a circus in which there will be convictions made and maximum sentences recommended. A breeze for any prosecutor – a career-maker, however, am I right? – and what a job the defense counsel has – someone call Bobby or Eugene, they’ll take care of the job!

In a fair, civil trial where one is innocent until proven guilty and tried by an unbiased jury of his peers, the kind of thing that takes place every day in courtrooms throughout the free and just United States of America – let’s say, for the lack of evidence, a very, very good attorney and all of these things considered – the verdict comes back as Not Guilty. What happens then? Do we start again, have someone undertake the monumental task of writing another 9/11 Commission Report, reintroduce all the controversy on torture, airport security, maybe let things go back to normal? Or send another twenty thousand troops to any Middle Eastern country we can suck the resources from, under the universal pretense of War? Oh wait, this isn’t about that.

Only a terrorist for suggesting such a preposterous idea! Why, I’m just extolling the virtues of the Great American Justice System – ‘the system,’ for short. Every person and their republican grandmother is expecting this to be the biggest landslide since last November, though we can’t say anything about that, we can just broadcast the trial – much to O.J.’s publicist’s chagrin – and wait for the unbiased, lawful verdict.

Of course, I don’t know all the evidence they have, I’m just listening to the various news sources saying there isn’t much – and the common sense that says the Guantanamo Bay lockup was one of the biggest cop-outs in American history. These guys committed these heinous crimes against the U.S., and it makes perfect sense that it shouldn’t be a military trial, doesn’t it? Just because they were held at a military compound where their interrogations were outside U.S. jurisdiction and thus open to cage matches, golden showers and all sorts of kinky things does not mean that they should be tried under U.S. Military Law.

No crime by these people was committed against the military or in it, and yet Americans are scared shitless of letting these guys into our beloved country they so violated with their beliefs and penknives – where they should have been detained since Day One. We don’t export our serial killers, rapists, cop killers, child molesters or even our Breaching spies! We lock them up in a maximum security prison, toss them into GenPop, and what happens happens. Leave them in Emerald City, Sing Sing, Leavenworth, and I highly doubt the guards would require much of a bribe to turn the other cheek. Even our Prisoners are still Americans, and some of them are Patriots, and I’ll bet they can’t wait to prove it.

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